Eh Brah!

A smash and grab on a fruit stand cash box? That’s low, brah. The guy sells huge, buttery avos for 50 cents and starfruit for a dime. I could get a bag of fruit there for pocket change, and it’s walking distance from my house. And since you robbed him, he has stopped supplying the stand. Yeah, you put him out of business. And you got what, 10 dollars out of it? Not even enough for a 12-pack. You suck at life, brah, I hope you get blindsided by a cane truck.

Illustration by Ron Pitts