Your MauiTime Horoscope

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Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) Whoa. I’m getting a tan just standing next to you. Putting out this much shine must really be straining the fusion reaction that is your heart. However, don’t shut it down. Those who can’t take the glow, the UV radiation, or the heat may back off for a bit (unconsciously spreading your notoriety even further) but trying to flip on the dimmer switch is like trying to stop a sneeze—definitely not a good idea. Keep on … [Read more...]

Your Special MauiTime Horoscope

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Cancer (June 21-July 22) You often get the front seat to various minor soap operas, and let’s face it; you enjoy it. It can be fun to watch other people freak out, screw each other or screw each other over (or both), fall in and out of love, and generally be sloppy and eminently human. Be careful of this week’s newest drama, though. It’s the kind that can suck you right into it before you’ve even noticed; there’s no fourth wall in this … [Read more...]

Your Super Special MauiTime Horoscope

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Cancer (June 21-July 22) Make life easier on yourself. You’re just clinging to that irritating behavior out of stubbornness. You know that most of those you adore find that habit annoying, and—if truth be known—you’re not even all that attached to it anymore, yourself. You’ve just been holding on to it out of fear of appearing to capitulate to others’ demands or desires. That would be awful, to give people the impression that they had some … [Read more...]

Your Super Special Maui Horoscope

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Cancer (June 21-July 22) Things get tricky when you live in an economy of scarcity. Sharing—of anything; love, food, your bed—becomes nigh unto impossible when you believe there won’t be enough to satisfy your own needs, let alone others’. “Let them take care of themselves,” you think. “I’ve barely got enough for me.” Unfortunately, it’s that kind of attitude that begets true scarcity. Imagine your positions were reversed; you’d dearly wish … [Read more...]

Your Maui Horoscope

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Gemini (May 21-June 20) A little more than a decade ago, artist Taryn Simon created a work entitled The Innocents, documenting the lives of people who served time for crimes they didn’t commit. In it, she questions photography’s use as eyewitness accounts, because wrongful convictions often occur from a victim’s response to photographs and lineups during law enforcement’s identification process. Images can blur the line between possible … [Read more...]

Are Leos Becoming Virgos? and Other Cosmic Questions From Sign Language

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Gemini (May 21-June 20) You may wish you could just hit SAVE this week, in real life instead of on your computer. That way you could start over if things went sour. I wish you could, too. You’re at that point where you’ve done pretty well so far, but if you continue to try to finish the task at hand—whether it’s an actual project, a conversation, or a marriage proposal—you could really screw things up. Of course, you can’t really leave things … [Read more...]

Your Special Maui Horoscope

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  Gemini (May 21-June 20) Even the arms of your Mama, lover or best friend won’t feel that comforting right now. That’s because you’re growing up, Gemini. That doesn’t mean you can never take refuge in those arms again—you just can’t right now. Those people will never deny you, but you must inevitably deny yourself, so you can develop the self-nurturing skills you need. You’re supposed to be the most versatile of signs, damn it, and … [Read more...]

Your Maui Horoscope

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Taurus (April 20-May 20) You’re as multi-layered as an onion, as fresh as a new apple, and as nutritious and good for those around you as broccoli. Too bad most people lately have been focusing on the worst of you, assuming that you’ll make them cry, spoil everything you touch, and be a bad-tasting obligation. Sadly, there’s not much you can do. Overcoming people’s presuppositions and judgments about you is hard, since they won’t let you close … [Read more...]

Your MauiTime Horoscope

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Taurus (April 20-May 20) The other night, I dreamt I was directing a new horror movie called Noise, about a house that killed people using sound. I woke up loving the idea of a supernatural, conscious house (even a malign one), and then I thought of you, and your recent conception that less-than-benevolent forces are at work against you. No, I can’t definitively prove that your car, apartment, or elevator isn’t out to get you. But I’d like to … [Read more...]

Your MauiTime Horoscope

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Leos really need to pick their antelope prey carefully this week... Taurus (April 20-May 20) Be aware this week what conscious or unconscious goals you may be manifesting, because your acts will have extra thrust; sitting on your ass and watching television will make you obese and miserable faster than you’d think. Taureans often need to be encouraged to ditch your responsibilities so you can have some fun; this week, however, it’s best to … [Read more...]